WHY DO PEOPLE CALL IT FUCK, MARRY, KILL WHEN THEY COULD CALL IT BED, WED, BEHEAD
easy there henry
whos henry what thef uck?
*faint laughter from Britian*
i want to sit on a kitchen counter in my underwear at 3 am with you and talk about the universe
when the person u hate does something that makes everyone else hate them:
Shakespeare is my favourite writer(:
I CRIED OF LAUGHTER WHEN WE READ THIS IN SCHOOL AND NO ONE UNDERSTOOD WHY
Went out and bought a can of pineapple juice cuz Waka said it’d make my cum taste better
too bad your sock doesn’t have taste buds
Why You Shouldn’t Take Selfies Right Next to a Moving Train
im sorry but
I’ve never watched an episode of Game of Thrones in my life and even I know that you don’t fuck with the blonde dragon lady.
and that the kid with the crown is the human version of period cramps
and jon snow is ned stark’s bastard
that’s the show
That’s the most accurate description of Joffrey i’ve ever read.
“i want to wear shorts because it’s hot but i really hate my legs” an autobiography
“I want to wear shorts but i didnt shave” the sequel.
“I want to wear shorts but I don’t tan and I’d rather not blind you” The trilogy
“I want to wear shorts but my huge dick always sticks out” a pop-up book
a pop up book
there is not a feeling more uncomfortable than flushing the toilet while you’re still on it
If I’m sitting at my computer desk, my Chihuahua, Bambi, will walk over to me and put her front paws on my leg. If I don’t pay attention, she will scratch at my arm or leg, depending on how I am sitting. When I look over at her, she will stop and lie her head sideways on my lap and just look at me, waiting to be pet or lifted up onto my lap.